Nothing IS happening, i.e., it is appearing to happen. But that is not the same as actually happening, in a solid, permanent kind of way. ALL is an appearance, not an actuality.
P.S. I recently heard Paul Hedderman say on an mp3 of one of his talks that his girlfriend showed him a cartoon that featured two doors. Over the first it said “HEAVEN” and over the second it said “Lecture about HEAVEN,” and all the people were cued up in front of the second door!? :)
When it comes to your own awakening, go directly for it. Don’t let talking about it or reading books or watching videos be enough. They can be useful up to a point, but eventually you have to turn within and see it for yourself. See what? That the wholeness you seek is not “out there,” but always available right where you are, here and now… in fact it’s not available anywhere else.
Your true face in the mirror
You will never have a bigger shock then the moment you realize that you have never been anything you have perceived. It is beyond mind blowing… oh, the mind is still there (when it is), but it’s no longer mistaken (mis-taken) for you. You are prior to any thought or appearance. Nisargadatta said, “You are nothing perceivable or conceivable.” However, these are just words until you see it directly, for yourself. It’s an intuitive knowing that comes and goes, until finally it settles. Once this happens it becomes impossible to take yourself as anything.
All that’s ever known are descriptions of form where no form actually exists. These descriptions may be helpful at times, but they’re ultimately meaningless. There can be no true description of anything. -Darryl Bailey
In other words, if EVERYTHING is constantly changing and thus never static (including a sense of you!), what exactly is there to label?
By the time you define it, it’s already not that… ALL definitions are too late!
Thus there can be a letting go of the attempt to define anything, and simply resting in the immediacy of what IS.
Causeless joy/peace is revealed to already be present when the belief in the idea of a separate “me” is seen through. Is the thought of a “you” the same as an actual separate, independent entity? No. It’s just a thought. There is no substance behind it. The thought is the full sum of the entire experience! There is nothing more to it. Have a look! Same for feelings. It will come as the biggest and most wonderful surprise when you realize that the cause of all your suffering never actually existed!
“The deeper in I go, so to speak, the more obvious it becomes that all meaning is merely a present appearance.”
MICHAEL: Whatever is happening is simply what’s happening, including whatever meaning seems to be presently running… for no one. It’s simply what’s happening, including the sense that it’s happening to ‘me.’ (Look directly in this moment and see if you can actually find this ‘me’… it’s like grasping water.)
ARJANEKKE: Even if identification comes up? Or defending of the ego? I tend to feel like i ‘failed’ when that happens..
MICHAEL: Yes Arjanneke. So if a feeling arises, “I reacted to something, I guess that means I am not ‘there’ (wherever the hell that is!?) yet.” can also arise! It’s just what’s happening and is never personal simply because no actual “person” can be found. It doesn’t belong to any ‘one,” as that requires division, separation. If you take a look, you can never find anything separate from THIS, even the sense of “you.”
Ironically, if we just ‘pay it no mind’ it simply, like a passing cloud, moves on by itself. However, it’s our very fixation/ruminating on it that feeds it and appears to keep it running. Fortunately the suffering can become so painful, that you simply no longer care and it’s in that moment of not knowing anything that freedom is revealed to already be the case. It doesn’t require any figuring out, but rather a letting go. It sounds funny, but in a way it’s simply seeing ‘resistance is futile’ and so you stop fighting and just relax into being.