My day with Scott Kiloby and his “Unfindable You” February 16, 2013

I spent today at Scott Kiloby’s workshop in Santa Monica, CA and he took us indepth into his “unfindable self” inquiry by having us all do it (23 of us). I found the “teaching” direct, practical, and a great “tool” for when you are stuck or spinning, and can’t seem to get “unstuck.”

The first point is that it is designed to be used on real situations when you are actually suffering, as opposed to “what if’s” or”theoreticals.” So, for example, in the thought, “I am depressed,” if you just look at the words alone, the actual physical letters one by one, do you see YOU actually in them? In other words, is the “YOU” that is depressed actually in the words themselves?

No. They are just words. Pure words, no YOU who is suffering somehow inside them. YOU are what is aware of, or the space for, the words. And so next we move on to the feeling you are experiencing, sans words. And, again, you try to find the YOU that “is feeling depressed”, but you just can’t do it. It’s 100% feeling, and there is no “you” insight! (And in fact during the workshop today, I noticed that the energy that I felt inside which I labeled “fatigue” wasn’t calling itself that! It was simply energy that feels the way it feels. It was my mind that was labeling that sensation as “fatigue.”

Scott calls this the “velcro effect,” where your words (the story you are telling yourself over and over) “velcro” or stick to a feeling, thus giving them a description they do not inherently possess. Basically you are believing what the thought is telling you just because it’s telling it to you and NOT because its TRUE!

It’s like we are taking something personal that isn’t ours to begin with. Eventually you come to see that you can’t find “You” in anything! But the strength of this inquiry does not reveal itself until you actually take the time to do. Just reading it won’t do it. (Which is why Scott has several skilled facillatators that people can get coaching from.)

You can check out Scott’s website at: www.kiloby.com

Michael Jeffreys

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True Acceptance Leaves Nothing Out February 15, 2013

When this moment is truly accepted as it IS, meaning ALL is accepted, both the “wanted” and the “unwanted,” it’s possible to find a vast space present that has room for everything, AS IT IS.

It’s a LIVING space, and so trying to analyze it with your mind will only keep you spinning and stuck, as opposed to accepting, allowing and loving.

The secret is to accept or “make space” for (actually, the space is already there, or you wouldn’t even be aware of the feeling, thought, sensation, or emotion) ALL that you are experiencing AS it arises… The good, the bad, and the ugly! 😉

While the mental “you” might not think it can handle such an “OPEN door policy,” the real you, the infinite space that you are beyond all descriptions has no problem BEing with what IS. “IT” has doing it ALL “your life.”

Once you catch on to this way of BEing (accepting rather than judging/analyzing everything), the next step is to put it into practice repeatedly until it becomes second nature. In other words, you no longer have to think about accepting or not accepting… ACCEPTANCE simply happens automatically.

This way of BEing is so incredibly liberating, not because it eliminates unpleasantness, but because you find you have space within you to allow it to be, fully, as it is. An open, full, loving Space that perhaps before you didn’t even realize you had within you. It’s a “being with,” in an authentic way, versus trying to change or get rid of your present moment experience.

-Michael Jeffreys

Jeff Foster’s Deepest Acceptance: THIS Moment… However it Appears February 12, 2013

The Deepest Acceptance that Jeff Foster speaks about in his latest book and CDs (as well as at the Santa Monica Eckhart Tolle Meetup, Feb. 10, 2013, where the above picture of us was taken), is a full ACCEPTANCE of THIS moment, however it appears…

I see that I AM ALREADY the SPACE for that which is presently appearing. ALL appearances, even the “resistance, pain, suffering, heartbreak, and misery” are all fully allowed, fully embraced, fully loved. And if that is not possible at the moment, than that is what is!
What is presently appearing is not good or bad, but simply what ACTUALLY is. And so the ‘non-acceptance’ of ‘what is’ is also fully made space for–actually, it’s already here (or you wouldn’t know about it!), so the space has already been made!

Leave none of your children out… let them play and vibrate and appear however they wish to express themselves. Acceptance leaves nothing out, regardless of its appearance. The screen welcomes the movie totally, regardless of its contents, because that’s what screens are there for… to give the movie a place to appear on.

-Michael Jeffreys

 Comment I received on Facebook after posting the above:

Adam: “uh? k… (devils advocate) I hear you… but get serious dude… sombody rapes your mom? … acceptance? lol…:buzzer: wrong answer…(jussayin) its a great philosophy, no doubt, but has its limits…”

Michael: “Adam, if someone were to rape my mom (she’s dead and been cremated, but for illustrative purposes let’s say she were still alive)… if that were to happen, how would me NOT accepting it help if that is what actually happened?

This is not about DENIAL. So crying or anger could arise… and those too would be accepted… or not. And then not being able to accept would be accepted… or not.

It’s a very subtle, but very freeing perspective when you see this. ALL is accepted NOT because you like or don’t like what’s happening, but because that is all the moment asks of you. “Here I AM, ready or not!” says THIS moment. 🙂 Acceptance means simply being authentic with what is… whatever that is. And you can’t know ahead of time what that will be like…”

What is Looking? Flipping the Camera Around February 5, 2013

 

What happens when you “flip the camera around”?

In other words, when you become aware of the One who is observing out of your eyes, NOW, THIS very moment.

What happens when you shift your attention to the One who is looking? If it’s truly your heart’s desire to awaken, than stop being so interested in WHAT you are observing and start being more interested in THAT which is doing the observing. Get to know YOURSELF. How? By allowing your attention to fall back on itself.

Read that again: By allowing your attention to fall back on itself.

It’s the opposite of where your attention normally goes, which is “out there.” Instead, go in reverse and trace backward toward whence you come from. Eventually thoughts will run out of suggestions, but don’t stop. Just have it in your heart’s desire to keep going, even without thought. Let something “awaken” in you to show you the way home.

And what you may discover, shockingly, is that try as you might, you can’t seem to truly find yourself! Like water, the ‘real’ you slips from your grasp every time, despite your best effort to grab it and hold onto it. So, despite truly finding nothing, the paradox of all paradoxes is that, nevertheless, HERE YOU ARE!!!!!

-Michael Jeffreys